I have missionary friends in literally every part of the world. These are people who sacrifice much for the sake of sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ with people who need to know Him as Lord and Savior. Today I’d like you to take a moment right where you are to pray for our international missionaries. Pray for their safety, their obedience, and their families. Most of all, pray that God would use them in incredible ways to impact the Kingdom.

From the comfort of our own homes, it can be difficult to really relate to what many international missionaries endure for the sake of the call. I’ve had the privilege already this month of meeting several new missionary families in person. Their call is evident. Their passion is contagious. Their commitment is clear. Whether here in the United States or around the world, the commission of Christ-followers is to go and share the love and message of Christ at every opportunity. I am immensely grateful for these missionaries who leave their families to go and serve in places where most of us probably wouldn’t desire to go.

If I’ve learned anything at all from my missionary friends, it’s that the love of Christ knows no boundaries and no limits. I invite you to take six minutes of your time right now to watch this beautiful video, put to the world edition of Chris Tomlin’s “How Great is Our God.” I think you’ll be blessed as your heart is drawn to the unreached people all over the world.

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.” – John 3:16-17 (ESV)

That’s the essence of Christmas. God loves us so much that He gave the perfect gift by sending Jesus to be our Redeemer. “Joy to the world! The Lord is come. Let earth receive her King!”

IT’S YOUR TURN!
Is there any particular people group or region of the world that your heart is drawn to pray for?

One of my dad’s favorite Christmas songs is Elvis Presley’s “Blue Christmas.” For many this year, the holidays are proving especially challenging — even blue, as the case may be. I know a number of people who have lost loved ones and are spending their first Christmas without a spouse, a child, a mother, a father, a sibling, a grandparent, or a best friend. For those who are grieving a loss, Christmastime can actually exacerbate their feelings of sadness and loneliness. Many of these people will make a brave effort to carry on. They may have managed to haul out the decorations, put up the tree, and listen to some festive music, but it’s just not the same.

The very memories that comfort can also evoke a deeper pain. Little things the person never even thought about before are now right at the forefront of the mind. They run across an ornament that held special meaning for their loved one, and their eyes begin to water. They hear a silly Christmas song that used to drive their loved one crazy — or a sappy movie often shared together — yet somehow this year that memory just underscores the sense of loss. They cook — or are served — a favorite holiday food their loved one just couldn’t do without, and it just doesn’t taste the same. During times like this we often discover a profound truth: The things we thought we loved most were really only loved because of the ones we shared them with.

There are many firsts that are hard to handle:

• Finding that stocking and knowing it probably doesn’t need to be hung this year.
• Addressing Christmas cards, signed without the deceased family member’s name. (This exercise is ten times worse when the annual card or letter is the means by which news of the death must be shared with long-distance friends and acquaintances.)
• Realizing that this year is the first year — maybe ever — that cards and/or gifts will not be exchanged with that special person.

Of course, death is not the only thing that can sour the holiday season. There are many parents dealing with devastating illnesses — for themselves or one of their children. Every effort may be made to make this Christmas the best one ever. After all, the unspoken fear is that this might be the last one they’ll have together. And even with all the effort put forward, the reality is that neither party may have enough energy to actually enjoy it.

I’ve been reminded this year that life is so incredibly precious. I attended one funeral service last week in Mississippi — and had another this week that I really should have attended. Over the next couple days I’ll attend two more. I have several friends and family members fighting extremely uphill battles with cancer — and other friends who are sitting with their terminally ill children, already in hospice care. For them, twinkling Christmas lights just don’t matter much right now.

With just a week or so left before Christmas Day, let me offer a few thoughts. Perhaps you are one of those people I’ve described above. If so, don’t be too hard on yourself. Everyone grieves a little differently. Resist the urge to isolate yourself from the hustle and bustle around you. The sounds that seem so obnoxiously annoying this year will, in time, gain a new sense of significance that you’ll again appreciate. Joy can return to your hurting heart — and it will. Also, know that as silly as it might sound, a ‘scheduled cry time’ may take the edge off and allow you to be more engaged with those around you. You must find what works for you — and unfortunately that process is mainly trial-and-error.

If you’re someone who just stumbled upon this page and is thinking, “How depressing!”, then I congratulate you on your banner year — but remind you that we usually don’t know when we’ll transfer from joy-filled to grief-stricken. Tragedy is unpredictable, and loss is often unforeseen. Be sensitive to those in your life who are going through the holidays without someone they love. Jot them a note of encouragement, just to let them know you’re thinking about them and you care. Don’t worry, you won’t ‘remind’ them of their loss; they’re quite aware of it. It will mean more to them than you can possibly know to hear that someone remembers the hole in their heart.

In practicing grace, kindness, and generosity to those who are grieving, sad, burdened or downtrodden, you will embrace the very essence of what this season is all about. You can’t keep anyone from having a ‘blue Christmas,’ but you can help it be just a shade lighter. (See what one church in Tennessee is doing to minister to those who are hurting: Click Here)

IT’S YOUR TURN!

• Are you experiencing a blue Christmas this year? If so, what suggestions can you offer for how people can help you?
• Have you recently ministered to someone who is struggling this holiday season? How was your attempt at kindness received?

I remember very well marking items in the Sears and JCPenney catalogs as I created a ‘wish list’ in my younger days.  I often find myself sitting in our living room, looking at our tree (at right) and thinking about what I most wish for now. Most of us, I believe, still have ‘wish lists,’ but we rarely write them down in our hurried lives. It’s true that the best things in life can’t be wrapped in pretty paper and finished off with a bow.

Here’s my grown-up Christmas list — in no particular order:

• I wish for more people to know Christ personally.
• I wish for a cure for cancer, a disease that has taken its toll on my family through the years — and that currently threatens the lives of many.
• I wish for a few new deep friendships where I can be free to be me.
• I wish for more quiet time with God, to know Him better.
• I wish for more quality time with my wife. Our waking moments together are so busy.
• I wish for more children in this world to have the blessing of godly parents.
• I wish for protection for our troops, wherever they may serve.
• I wish for peace in a world full of chaos.
• I wish for time to stand still for those few moments when I hold my children in my arms.
• I wish for godly spouses for my children when they grow up.

And yes, I will always wish for a white Christmas — and am hopeful that one day that one really will come true!

There are so many more things that I wish for — and pray for. I encourage you to take a moment to jot down your own grown-up Christmas list.

I pray that you will always remember that Jesus is the reason for this wonderful season of the year.

Merry Christmas to you and your family!

We’re encouraged to focus on our job . . . our family . . . our health . . . our relationship with Christ. I don’t know about you, but I’ve found it difficult to focus while multi-tasking. And that’s what we do so much of in this fast-paced world in which we live.

Focus demands time, attention, discipline, determination. It demands energy, perseverance, and practice. Perhaps more than anything else though, focus requires intentionality. After all, it is just far too easy to become distracted.

As believers in Christ, focus happens when we begin to view all we do as an expression of God at work in us and through us. It is, in fact, our relationship with Him that becomes the lens through which everything else properly comes into focus.

At this season of the year, so often we focus on the baby in the manger. And while that’s a vital part of the Christmas story, I find it more significant to focus on the meaning of the Christ-child’s name: Emmanuel. Not “God was with us” or “God is gonna be with us” but rather “God IS with us.”

In one moment more than 2000 years ago, the hope of the world was born. And nothing will ever be the same. Are you living your life in the reality of Emmanuel? Would you say some of the things you say, watch some of the things you watch, or do some of the things you do if you really considered that He is with you? For me, that’s a sobering thought — and one that has the power to change my focus.

Perhaps it can help change yours as well.

Before that leftover turkey has undergone its radical transformation into soup or salad, the guilt and fear sets in. Guilt, because you get so tired of breaking those promises year after year. Fear, because there’s so much to do and so little time.

Yes, every year we seem to try and cram more and more stuff into the same 20-some-odd days between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Shopping and parties and programs and banquets compete for lines on that crazy calendar. You know, the one we used to keep with pen-and-paper — but which many of us now keep electronically so that it can be properly synchronized with the work calendar, the family calendar, and whichever other calendars are integral parts of life as we know it.

In a matter of just a few days, the calendar looks like a multicolored patchwork quilt, with each event assigned its own category and level of importance.

Well, maybe yours isn’t that bad. But in church life that’s not too much of an exaggeration. I love getting together with people — not that I’m really the life of the party — but I enjoy hanging out over a couple cups of hot cider and a few too many of those calories that come on way easier than they come off!

Of course, sometime in between all that shoppin’ and hobnobbin’, the Christmas cards have to get done. And our list seems to grow significantly each year.

Yes, this is Christmas. Busy, bustling, brimming with opportunities for social engagement. Friends, family, and fellowship.

Why, it’s a spitting image of the first Christmas, isn’t it?

Well, not exactly. Rather than trumpets and fanfare, there was a pretty silent night. Rather than loads of people with beautifully decorated homes offering invitations, there was a simple expectant couple, weary from a long journey, looking for a place to stay the evening. Rather than gripes and groans about an over-extended schedule, there was a generous amount of gratitude for an humble stable and a kind-hearted inn-keeper.

As we get ready for the Christmas season, let’s remember what it’s all about.

It’s not about festive parties . . . brightly-colored packages . . . or fruit-flavored punch.

It’s not about cards . . . or calendars . . . or candy.

It’s not about nutcrackers . . . or eggnog . . . or even the nuts in your family tree.

It’s about a love story.

“For God so loved the world that He sent His only begotten son, that whosoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)

God loved you so much that He sent His Son to come to earth and live as a human . . . to dwell among us . . . to walk where we walk.

With Christmas we celebrate the biggest “I love you” ever spoken.

Love came down. The stars beamed. The angels rejoiced. And the world was forever changed.

Don’t let all your stuff drown out that message. It’s the greatest message the world has ever known.

Take time to enjoy your holiday season . . . and to proclaim the real reason for the season wherever you may go.

Those presents — that took hours to find and wrap — were torn open in a matter of minutes, leaving your tree feeling rather naked. All that food, prepared with great care, was devoured in 30 minutes’ time. The outdoor light displays, which brought so much sparkle to your neighborhood, now lay unattended on many of the lawns around.

And trash. Let’s talk about trash. I really feel for the garbage collectors this time of year. I don’t know about you, but we needed several extra dumpsters to properly dispose of our evidence of Christmas.

I hope you had a good holiday. However, I also realize that it is often after the buzz of the holiday when sadness and loneliness can set in.

Maybe you only got to see those precious loved ones for a little while. . . maybe not at all. Maybe you are just now counting those Christmas cards, realizing that you received only about half as many as you mailed. Maybe you’re looking around the house and wondering why you bothered to go to so much trouble for such a short burst of holiday fun.

I encourage you to practice positive self-talk when your thinking starts to travel downhill like that. Rather than lamenting the short visit with family (whether in person or by phone), give thanks for the fact that you have people who actually care enough to call at all. Some people don’t have even one. Tell yourself, “I am loved. I am special. I am significant. I matter to somebody.”

When you do your Christmas card sent/received tally, offer thanks for each one received. Tell yourself, “This person thought I was worth taking the time — and 41 cents (plus the price of the card).” Also, don’t get caught in the trap of keeping score. Remember the truth of the season: it is more blessed to give than to receive.

When you get to questioning why you go to all the trouble, be careful! Offer thanks for the fact that you have good-enough health to be able to decorate, cook, shop. . . and all those other things you did to make the season extra special for yourself and those you love. Lots of people are not able to do that. Tell yourself, “I am worth the trouble, even if I’m the only one who got to enjoy it.”

Christmas and its aftermath are like everthing else in life. It’s what you make it. As you head into the last week of 2007, take some time to reflect on the blessings you have received. Take some time to thank God for the opportunities you have had to be a blessing to others.

And take some time just to celebrate you. You’re worth it, you know?

One of my favorite traditions as a kid was getting to go to my grandparents’ house for dinner and gifts every Christmas Eve. Of course, that stopped when I was in junior high — all because of a silly little rift in the family. (Yes, we counselors have those too. . . probably more than we’d like to admit.)

Traditions are things that provide a sense of bonding and belonging. They can take on a life all their own, if you’re not careful. . . so I advise people to practice their traditions with a high degree of flexibility, as long as they do not compromise their values.

Last night, we participated in one of our traditions. We went out to dinner and then drove around various neighborhoods in the city enjoying the festive light displays. Some people really get into it. It gets downright competitive in some areas. I hope that it all stays friendly!

Our kids enjoyed seeing many Santas, reindeer, and nativity scenes. My almost two-year-old daughter was so cute. . . seemed every other breath she was saying, “Hey, baby Jesus”. . . “Hey, Santa.”

We had planned to observe another of our holiday traditions tonight — baking and decorating the Christmas cookies. However, we forgot that the dough has to chill for several hours before it is suitable for cutting. . . not to mention the fact that the ingredients had not all yet been bought. Oops! So the cookies are scheduled to bake tomorrow afternoon. (That’s what I mean by flexibility.)

Tomorrow evening will be a great time of celebration as well. No matter where we have lived, we have made Christmas Eve worship a centerpiece of our experience. I can think of no better way to keep Christ front and center. There’s something special about gathering with fellow believers to sing familiar carols, light candles, and share in the reading of the Christmas story.

Following the service, we plan to enjoy a light dinner of minestrone soup (it cleans up so quickly!) and opening of family gifts. Then we’ll sing some carols together around the piano and get the kiddos in their Christmas pajamas.

The kids will, of course, set out some special-made cookies for the jolly elf. This year, I understand he’ll be getting chocolate milk. . . apparently by request! We’ll read The Christmas Star and The Night Before Christmas together as a family before tucking the little ones in for the night. (Santa won’t come if you’re awake, you know.)

On Christmas Day, we traditionally have a noontime meal fit for a king, followed by a homemade birthday cake for Jesus. This year it’s red velvet.

Every family is different. Some are rich in tradition. . . some not so much. I encourage you to think through what you want your traditions to accomplish. Keep those that work, and always look for new ones that make your family rich in fun, love, and reverence.

However you celebrate Christmas this year, may the Christ child truly be the One you seek to honor.

From our house to yours. . . peace, love, Jesus, and a very Merry Christmas.

How are you doing?

It’s a question asked often during the course of a typical day, yet it has become much more of a cliche as the pace of our lives has picked up speed.

“How are you doing?” was once an honest attempt to engage people. . . to connect with them in a meaningful way. Now it’s little more than a greeting chosen from a standing mental list of six or seven. “Hi”. . . “hello”. . . “good morning”. . . “how ya doin’?” (if you’re from the South like me) or “howdy” (as my Aggie friends prefer).

This time of year, it’s easy to rush through life and not take time to even ask the question — let alone stick around for the answer. If you ask it right, you’ll hopefully get more than a standard “fine, thanks” in response.

Today I’m asking you this question regarding your priorities during these days leading up to Christmas. With all the things that are going on in our lives, we have to be intentional about keeping the focus on people. It’s about relationships! And the Christmas season provides the perfect opportunity to focus on that.

I’m reminded of the biblical account of Jesus’ visit with two sisters, Mary and Martha, in Luke 10. As the story goes, Mary sat at the feet of Jesus listening to what he said. Martha, however, was busy taking care of all the details. (I imagine her cooking and cleaning in a frenzied fashion because an important guest stopped in.) And Martha was quite frustrated that Mary wouldn’t help her. When Martha asked for Jesus to tell Mary to pitch in, Jesus actually commended Mary for having the right priorities. He said, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

If your Christmas to-do list is anything like mine, you will have no trouble at all keeping busy over the next week or so. As you think through that list, let me ask you this: In spite of all that remains to be done, are you keeping your focus on the main thing? Or are you falling into a trap of perfectionism, falsely believing that just one more detail will make or break your holiday celebration?

Don’t get me wrong. I know that details are necessary and even important at times. We just have to be careful to not let the details become the main thing. As I used to tell my customers, “It is better – and more practical — to buy a tie to go with a suit than the other way around.” 

So, let me ask you again: How are you doing?

Tonight when you finally flip off the light and sink into bed, don’t let any obsessive thoughts keep you from getting the rest you need. Instead, offer a prayer of thanksgiving for the people in your life that make it worth living. Choose what is better, and it will not be taken away from you.

I’ve always had a pretty bad case of mall fever. I like the hustle and bustle, the noise, and the smells (especially at the cookie and cinnamon roll shops). Every year around this time, I think back to how much I enjoyed working at the mall through my college and seminary days.

I worked in several areas, primarily men’s furnishings and customer service. I really liked getting to help customers create a well-coordinated outfit. During the Christmas season, it was a bit more difficult because the people doing the shopping rarely knew the precise tastes and sizes of the intended recipients. . . so that was quite challenging.

The thing I liked most about my time in retail sales was the vast array of people I had the opportunity to meet. I had a chance to interact with them in a way that helped or hindered their overall shopping experience, and I took that role seriously.

People-watching has always been a favorite pasttime of mine, and there’s no better place to engage that passion than a shopping mall at Christmastime. I can learn so much about people by seeing which stores they shop, which foods they enjoy, and how they interact with others — family, friends, and strangers alike.

One thing I’ve noticed is that we frequently treat complete strangers a lot better than we treat our family members. (And we wonder why those holiday get-togethers can be stressful!) I think the main reason is that we feel our family members have to put up with us, regardless of our words and actions. Since it’s not quite the same with people we don’t know, I think we tend to try a little harder to get along.

I guess I enjoy watching people so much during the holiday season because they are typically busy, hurried, and stressed-out. If you’ve ever taken one of those personality inventories, you’re usually given a score or type based on how you are normally and how you are under stress. The two can be very different!

This season I encourage you to do a self-evaluation of sorts. Here are a few questions to help get your thoughts going:

• How did I treat my family members yesterday?
   
• How did I treat strangers with whom I had interaction? (i.e., the post office clerk, the grocery store employee, the guy who took/filled your order at Starbucks)
   
• How did I treat people as I drove around town? Was I short-tempered, hostile, or aggressive?
   
• How did I treat people in the crowded parking lot? Did I rush to take the last spot, even though another person had claimed it?
   
• What did the expression on my face tell people about me? Did they learn that I’m basically a nice person with a good heart — or a force to be reckoned with?
   
• Did my words bring grace to those who heard me? Or, did they add to the chaos of the moment?
   
• Are you the kind of person you’d like to meet on a regular basis? Or, would you tend to avoid yourself at all costs?
   
• If this were my last day on earth, would I be content with how I lived today?
   

Let me make a point for emphasis: this is a self-evaluation. It is not a tool to print out and give to the edgy postal worker, the snooty boutique owner, or the seemingly mute cashier at McDonald’s! This is about you.

Hopefully you were able to answer all those questions in a way that was pleasing to yourself — and that honestly reflected the reality of your inner beauty. But, if you’re anything like me, you may have discovered some areas that could use a tune-up.

Be of good cheer! Every day is a new day to practice being the person you hope to become. Don’t put off ’til tomorrow what you can do today. Self-improvement goals do not have to wait for the new year.

Make today count!

(By the way, this is such a good exercise to help you prepare for those delightful family members who you’ll get to see shortly! I’m sure you can hardly wait. )

All that extra stuff can be quite stressful when piled on top of regular daily activities.

Just today, my family and I were involved in Christmas shopping, a children’s choir practice, an open house, more shopping, and a dinner party. All were fun in their own right, but it would be really nice to be able to take in all the wonder of the season by having it spread out a little more.

At the party tonight, my wife and I had some good friends take photos of our family for the annual Christmas card. (Yes, we’re quite a bit behind schedule on that project too.)

Well, we were able to get some really good photos — you know, the ones where the clothing colors blend, the lighting is right, everyone’s eyes are open, and the kids are actually looking at the camera with their hands in appropriate places.

You can imagine our frustration to get home and realize that all the good shots were actually blurry. Now we have to get dressed again and find someone else to take our picture.

I know it will all work out just fine. I keep reminding myself to not sweat the small stuff — and in the big scheme of things, all this is small stuff.

Tonight when I lay my head on the pillow, I will give thanks to God, grateful for the love of family and friends. . . grateful for a warm home. . . grateful for a full tummy. . . grateful for so many things that make my life richer.

Yes, those are the things that matter most in life. Another day or two of work on the Christmas card won’t make or break the season. God gives us many opportunities to make choices for ourselves. I choose this day to focus on the big things.

I hope you’ll choose that too.